Ketchup, the ONLY Condiment

As I took my son's lunch request - a wrap with meat, cheese and ketchup - I thought of the obscene amount of ketchup we use in our family. Before we had kids, my husband and I would probably buy 2 bottles of ketchup each year. We use more in the summer, with barbequed hamburgers and the occasional hot dog, and making barbeque sauce when we would run out (ketchup and brown sugar and vinegar and garlic and a few spices, just ad libbing until it tasted okay). We also use some for dipping grilled cheese, and on Tortiere (that would be French Canadian meat pie - and there is supposed to be an accent on the first "e", but I have no idea how to do that on the computer!). So, overall, our ketchup use was very average.

Enter the children. Twins, currently aged 5. One boy, one girl, from now on known as Corwin and Clara (I might as well make use of the second names we had to pick in case we had two boys or two girls!). Okay, their diet started out much like any other babies - breast milk, formula, rice cereal, oatmeal, mushy veggies, mushy fruit, and so on. But once they started with the cut up cooked veggies, and small chunks of chicken, something changed. Clara discovered the art of dipping. She would dip Cheerios into her applesauce. And chicken into her mushy sweet potato. Then, around the age of 2 (I think - it's a little hazy), we went to that Mecca of all kid restaurants - McDonalds. They ate their cut up hamburgers with gusto. And they tried French Fries for the first time. Corwin really liked these golden strips of potato, with or without the ketchup. Clara, on the other had, was not too fond of the fry. However, she recognized it as the vehicle to eat as much ketchup as possible, since we wouldn't let her just drink the red stuff out of the little paper dip cup. If anyone remembers the candy called Lik-M-Stix, you will have the perfect mental picture of this meal. Clara would dip her fry, then lick the ketchup, and go back to dip more. She would eat the fry only when it became too soggy to carry any more of the red nectar to her eager little mouth (we were doling out said fries one at a time).

Back home, Clara started to ask for ketchup with her chicken. And her carrots. And just about anything in between. I realized the sign of the addict when I caught her dipping grapes into her ketchup. Ugh!!! We tried to tone it down, wean her off the red stuff without causing major withdrawal. We offered other dip choices - spinach, Ranch, plum sauce - but she was having none of it. Finally, we just gave in. The only ground rule was that she could not spoon ketchup alone into her mouth, it had to be accompanied by some other food. I am thankful that I took the advice of a friend with a similarly dip-addicted daughter, Lady B. Lady B's uncle (my friend's brother), gave his niece the gift of ketchup. The green one. And the purple one. My friend said that it was the most disgusting thing - it looked like Lady B was dipping her fish sticks into squished caterpillars - and advised me to avoid the introduction of the coloured ketchup. Luckily, it seems as though the Heinz company has removed the offending colours from the product lineup, sticking with classic red.

Now, at the age of five, both kids still enjoy ketchup, and Clara still more so than Corwin. We now use about 6 or 7 containers of ketchup per year - and those are family size bottles (1.5 litres - roughly 1.5 quarts). Clara has improved - she no longer dips fruit, and most of the time vegetables get dipped in ranch dressing, but there is a long list of food that requires a blob of ketchup on the side. The first day that Corwin said he didn't want any was kind of sad. His plate looked a bit naked on the way to the table. I wonder if Clara will one day say "no thanks" to the glistening red puddle, or if she will have it as an elegant side at her graduation/21st birthday/wedding dinner. Only time will tell.